photos – A Jaunty Little Blog

January 7, 2025January 7, 2025

Settle Down 2025, It’s Only Tuesday

Friends,

These are the things that are making my teeth ache today, on this seventh day of the new year. It’s by no means an exhaustive list, but it’s full of things that if taken individually, would make you at least want to close the drapes and stay in bed.

With that fun lead-in, let’s get to it…

Jimmy Carter’s body has arrived in the District of Columbia today to lie in state. I happened to turn on the teevee when a half dozen burly men transferred his casket from the hearse to the caisson in front of the U.S. Navy Memorial. I didn’t anticipate how hard it would hit that the funeral procession for such a decent man would begin the countdown to the inauguration of such a corrupt man as the incoming 47th president.
The incoming administration keeps making noises about buying or in some way taking, maybe by force, Greenland and the Panama Canal. The news outlets assume that these plans will be carried out in some way, so I’m not sure who’s more unhinged here.
Meta, the company that owns Facebook, Instagram, Threads, and WhatsApp has decided to run without fact checkers. This is more pre-obedience to the upcoming regime that’s going to get all of us in a lot of trouble by amplifying the dumb (see above) and burying the truth (see below).
The former and future president’s favorite judge, Aileen Cannon of Florida, has ruled against the release of Special Council Jack Smith’s report on the crimes he was investigating. She managed to get the order in 45 minutes before the report was to be turned over to the most ineffective U.S. Attorney General in the modern era, Merrick Garland. The release of the report relies on a ruling by the 11th Circuit and then a Supreme Court appeal. I’m sure we’re all on pins and needles wondering how that’ll go.
Intense winds are blowing through Southern California over the next few days, and Tommy’s Real Good Electric Utility (aka, Southern California Edison) has already warned us that they may have to shut off power to prevent wildfires. Too late to keep Pacific Palisades safe from fire this afternoon, but maybe that’ll be the extent of the destruction.
I just learned that the Apple Newton OS has a Y2026 bug. I’d let my Newton eMate 300 know, but it’s enjoying a spa day of deep battery cycles and a light vacuuming between the keys.
Justin Trudeau’s resignation as Canada’s Prime Minister is remarkably bad news, I think. He seemed to have a chance to deescalate the incoming administration’s tariff nonsense, but if he’s replaced with some hard line nationalist goon, who knows. A tit-for-tat trade war with Canada could be very bad for all of us.
Speaking of trade wars, can somebody rein in the once and future president’s pet billionaire? Elon Musk appears to be picking fights with European democracies and nobody can be sure if he’s acting alone or if he has the blessing of Time’s kleptocrat of the year.

Did I miss anything that’s keeping you up at night? Drop it in the comments and we’ll add it to the list of horrors!

Your best pal,

– bob

September 9, 2023September 9, 2023

Where to begin…

Friends,

I had an idea, which is dangerous on its surface, but it turns out that this idea has been kind of expensive. The idea revolves around the idea of distraction-free writing. Which is in itself a misnomer. Who isn’t distracted by things? Dogs, coyotes breaking into the backyard trying to eat dogs, Nine Inch Nails suddenly popping up in the playlist, a smell, the garbage trucks playing catch-up from the holiday weekend speeding down the street. You get the idea. Life is hectic.

I thought that if I were to spend more time posting to this here endeavor, I could dig through the rubble of history to find a nice technological solution to get away from the social media and email notifications constantly ding-ding-dinging just in my periphery.

I thought that I might take advantage of one of the best compact keyboards from the mid-90s. None other than the Newton External Keyboard with a USB adapter.

It works great, but there’s that distraction again with the iPad happy to share notifications about EVERYTHING. Geez Karen, cool it.

Then I thought that I’d spend a little time resurrecting the trusty Palm Pilot. I already had the folding keyboard, so how hard could it be?

Hard enough. Palm desktop won’t install on Intel Macs. Palm Pilots of a certain vintage don’t have drivers for the keyboard built in, and Memo stinks as a writing tool. Also, getting files out is just as challenging as it is with the Apple Newton eMate. In either scenario, there needs to be an old computer sitting around as an intermediary. It doesn’t help that the more recent versions of macOS don’t play nice with Appletalk and the Apple Filing Protocol. Because, you know, progress.

Also, did the Palm Pilot screen get smaller? Just me? okay.

The answer for distraction-free writing, staring down all of us tech nerds, is the manual typewriter. Slamming slugs against an ink-drenched ribbon to leave some meaning behind. You’ve heard of it.

I got very silly and bought a couple machines through eBay. Machines that looked cool, but machines that I don’t like very much.

The key effort is too high for me and my now-noodly copywriter arms. Also, I wasn’t ready for the stadium layout of the keys. It turns out that I just don’t want to reach that high for the number row, since I’ve spent all this time on flat keyboards. I stopped by the Idyllwild Help Center today and found the machine everyone has been telling me I’d love—a mid-60s Olivetti Lettera 32. The key layout is nearly flat and the effort is so light that I could type on this thing all day.

It’s an absolute joy to type on, and once I put in a new ribbon, it should be a nice addition to the typing horde.

The plan is pretty simple(-ish). I have a sheet-feed scanner that I can connect to a computer that’s on most of the time. I’ll type a page, plop it into the scanner, and through some scripting I can recognize the text and save the image of the page, so everything just posts to the blog.

Like magic.

I guess we’ll see if that works when I post my first typed blog post.

The 20-something marketing experts offering advice on how to build audiences suggest not making promises in your blog that you can’t deliver. I can’t let them down, can I?

Actually, I don’t mind letting them down, but not you, dear reader. Let’s make this happen!

Your pal,

– bob

April 18, 2023June 30, 2023

It Fills Your Heart

Friends,

Sometimes an offhand comment just hits you. My sweet wife and I were driving North on the first leg of our Spring vacation (because there needs to be a lot of them this year, so I’m holding out hope that they’re at least seasonal). We were winding our way through a stand of trees and she simply said, “I know it sounds corny, but this—the trees—they fill my heart. They fill it back up. Is that weird?” I had felt the same thing, but didn’t know how to put it into words. When your job is to make things up and write them down, that’s a big problem, but I felt it too.

Maybe there’s a point when the trees, the scale of the forest here, can help us remember the words. Maybe the sea air, the waves crashing, the salt spray, can clean up the mess on aisle five left by pandemics and rancor and a shoe that stubbornly refuses to drop.

No, it isn’t weird. Yes, it fills my heart too.

Your best pal,

– bob

April 3, 2023April 3, 2023

Tuning The Carbs

Friends,

I just got off the phone with a nutritionist named Jeanine who shared some things, like if one has diabetes, one must be very conscious of carbohydrates. I learned this from my Dad, who offered this advice, “Stay away from white food.” Before you imagine that he was referring to potato salad with raisins (ew. – ed), he meant rice, potatoes, and bread. 60 grams of carbohydrates a day. That’s my “budget.” Not a lot for me, since I love a good potato chip every now and again.

Jeanine also noted that I’m barely getting half of the exercise I should be putting in every week. If I have any desire to lose weight, it’s 300 minutes of exercise each week, at minimum. I’m thinking of starting here and building up to a more serious regimen. The problem is that I can’t seem to get started.

You know, maybe I should treat it as a nice way to mix up the routine.

Now that I think about it, another way to mix up the routine would be to fix a certain sad and broken Jeep languishing in my garage. (isn’t there also a sad and broken jeep in your driveway as well? – ed Yes. I’m reminded of that fairly regularly, but this is a different story.)

My fine Jeep Commando is a lot of fun to drive, but it’s sort of a pain to keep running. Slowly, I’m working on that problem. Now that electric cars are slated to take over from hydrocarbon-burning transportation, replacement carburetors are remarkably cheap. If you don’t believe me, look for regular, non-performance carburetors at Amazon, or Summit Racing, or Rock Auto. Those remanufactured carbs are pretty cheap, because the bet is that they’ll soon be obsolete. That calculus may be a little premature, but I’ll take it.

I also took the opportunity to replace the points in the distributor with a Pertronix unit. It’s a Hall-effect pickup that replaces the points and fits inside the distributor cap. That should take care of the “go” but I still need to address to the “whoa.” (seriously? -ed It was too good to pass up.)

Also, there might be some large holes in the floor…

Nothing that can’t be fixed, right?

Right?

Your pal,

– bob

February 1, 2023

I Appreciate You

Friends,

It’s the first of February, which is not necessarily notable since it’s an entire day before my birthday, but I’ve got a moment so let’s have at it.

Things have been happening here in America’s 23rd Most Disappointing City (did you make that up? -ed I sure did, but I’m gonna go with it for a while. What could be worse than not being the best at being the worst?). In-laws have been falling and going to the emergency room. Moisture fell out of the sky and filled up the back yard, drowning the lawn. Moisture fell out of the sky over the Secret Alpine Laboratory, which looks nicer…

The security cameras there captured the scene, but I haven’t been there for a solid month. This hurts my heart, to be completely honest. We may go Friday if the in-laws don’t fall again.

Sigh.

Speaking of security cameras, some of them are old and crap, so they need more light. Nowadays, Wi-Fi-connected lightbulbs can provide the needed lumens, but how to tell them apart? I’ve found that giving IoT devices cute names is annoying when issuing voice commands…

“Hey Siri, turn on The Light Colloquially Known As Sir Harriot Blammo VonDinkle”

Instead, I added pictures—and a deep sigh.

Ahh, that’s better.

Your pal,

– bob

January 10, 2023January 11, 2023

It’s The Little Things and The Big Things

Friends,

I haven’t been ignoring this here endeavor as much as I’ve been actively putting off updates. You’ll quietly wonder why and I’ll go ahead and tell you.

It’s all been too much.

Holidays, houseguests, dealing with other people’s illnesses, staying busy at work in spite of the year-end lull, and getting a new roof installed on two houses has all done a number on my psyche.

What’s one to do but let things settle down and wait for some inspiration to come. Well, that inspiration has arrived and it’s a real mess.

We’ve known each other for a while now, so it won’t shock you to learn that I try to know at least a little something about a lot of things. I also try to know a lot of things about a couple things so that I can gain some expertise in a subject, but also because constantly referring to reference materials makes me lose focus. Trap the facts in the buffer, get the job done quickly, and everybody’s happy.

I’ve recently started, due to lower ad spending at the end of this year, reading more about this here copywriting craft. I’m trying to learn more about who’s good, who’s not, why they’re considered good or not, and things I can do to get better. One of the paths to writing better copy (if you believe the current thinking) is not to write at all, but use an artificially-intelligent bot instead.

Mme. Puppy Dog and I both agree that using an AI is a remarkably bad idea unless I have an aching desire to appear redundant. Since this would impact the steady flow of kibble from the store to Madame’s belly, she disapproves.

Social Media (plural)

The world record holder for losing the most personal wealth in history has some abhorrent views and some abhorrent friends. I thought it’d be neat to move off of his bird service and migrate my social media attentions to some of the other services that aren’t Facebook or Instagram. The problem is that I can’t seem to settle on one that feels like a good fit.

I wanted to like Mastodon, but their web interface is pretty hectic. Tapbots is beta testing a client and I’ll look into that when it’s baked, but it’s not happening for me yet.

I’m also on Post.news and cohost.org in addition to my existing ello account. They’re really not scratching that itch of having a mass of fun people, delivering the latest news, and rapid updates. Maybe I’ll split my time between here and Substack.

As always, I appreciate your thoughts (unless they’re mean, spam, mean spam, or spam in a foreign language, then they’re deleted).

Your pal,

– bob

September 29, 2022September 29, 2022

What’s All Dat?

Friends,

It’s been a little while, hasn’t it? Since we last convened, I have injured my back rather severely, gone on a three-day work trip to New Orleans, Louisiana, adopted and brought back to life a very slow and very charming old computer, and I’m getting ready to put a roof on The Secret Alpine Laboratory. I also have very bad news about the Idyllwild Weather Clam that I can no longer suppress. Sufficiently teased? Great!

Remember to stretch

I thought that storm waters were flowing under the stem wall into the crawlspace under the cabin. Add some dirt, and the resulting mud flow had swamped some stacked drywall and lumber. Their stinky and moldy corpses were immediately punted to the landfill. However, it wasn’t local flooding at all. The problem was a perforated iron drain pipe from the kitchen sink. I cut it out, removed the mud, and jammed everything back into the garage.

Now, when I need to move equipment out, I’m navigating over a couple welders, around dead batteries, and through a narrow passage before I get them through the door. It’s tight and the obstacles are stabby. I grabbed the miter saw to chop the new custom threshold that was the wrong size. The first injury must’ve made a cartoon “sproing!” noise inside my back somewhere in the neighborhood of T10 or T11. The second part, where I turned the wrong way while still carrying the saw surely sounded like a Spanish galleon running aground on the rocky shores of L5-S1. I wouldn’t know because all I could see was white and all I could smell was pain.

That was on Labor Day.

Economy class

Three days later, I was on a plane headed for New Orleans to meet my coworkers in person for the first time. It’s hard to fault United Airlines for wanting to crowd as many people in each plane as possible. After all, the industry has received billions of dollars in loans and relief from American taxpayers over the last decade. They’re hurting for cash!

I haven’t been on a plane since our honeymoon before the pandemic. Since then, the seats have been moved even closer together, the cushions replaced with ones that are much thinner. Would the pain meds kick in soon? Maybe they already had and the pain from the back injury, plus the seats, plus the knees belonging to the woman seated behind me, was actually much greater than this.

This was the theme for the entire trip, unfortunately.

I had to plan ahead for every walking adventure. Is it too far? Can I make it back to the hotel on foot or will I have to call for a ride? After checking in at the hotel, I left to meet everyone who had arrived first and it was like old friends picking up where we’d left off. Except we’d never met in person. It’s a good group and we had a lot of laughs.

Even the next day, when we ventured out to hit a particular tourist spot, everybody had a great time.

Team building exercises, cajun bánh mì for lunch (You didn’t know that was a thing, did you?), then dinner at The Roosevelt. A packed schedule, for sure. The next day was just as packed. Vegetarian eggs benedict (Cajun style, ‘natch), quality time in an escape room, then off to the return trip home.

A funny thing happened on the way back. Same planes, but they were only half full. It took two planes to get home and both flights had a lot of empty seats, including the middle seat. I could spread out, stretch, and stop whimpering about the persistent back pain which had not relented.

It wasn’t until 10:30 or so that evening that I finally got home and was greeted by the welcoming committee.

Is this the party to which I am speaking?

Before I left on my trip, I won an auction for this little nugget…

Yes, that’s right. It’s an Apple Newton eMate 300 portable computer, from your childhood. This one seems to be in remarkably good shape, even though the battery was as flat as can be. It ran for about five minutes after a full charge, complaining about imminent automatic shutdown after two. Back to ebay for a five dollar nickel-metal hydride battery pack intended for a baby monitor. It’s the right shape, I just transferred the temp sensor so the charging circuit can detect if it’s overheating.

It’s that thing under the tape in the center of the batteries. Peel it off, cut the power leads and solder on the new ones. Stick the sensor down on the new pack and tape everything back together. Not only easy, but also peasy.

Now there’s the small problem of getting the thing to talk to any of the modern computers around here. Modern like the Clamshell iBook, or the 12-inch G4 Stuntbook. I installed the software and adapted the adapters, but still get a “can’t communicate with this computer” message. I’m stumped.

Cement pond

You know the old chestnut about how the cobbler’s children go barefoot? I never truly believed it, myself. Who’s going to raise a family with a fruit crumble? Absurd. (unless it’s peach. i love a peach cobbler. -ed)

Even though my Dad built pools for a living, he did next to nothing to repair the swimming pool at the family home. The tile was falling off, plaster cracked, diverter valves frozen in place, wiring strapped to piece of plywood held up by a single rusty nail. It was a real mess, but he was unwilling and later unable to do anything about it.

Since his passing, Mom has taken on the big projects, like rehabbing the pool. I have to say that it looks great.

An added bonus is that I’m the first person to actually go for a swim since its rehabilitation. I’m happy to report that it’s great. Wouldn’t change a thing.

The Sad and Tragic Demise of Big Fine Salty Mountain Tide Pool

As you know, we’ve been dealing with a longstanding drought here in California brought about by climate change. I’ve been doing my part to solve the problem, but not enough, apparently. Our gal, the Idyllwild Weather Clam was nowhere to be found when I arrived at my Secret Alpine Laboratory to have the roof replaced. Her tidepool was a dry and desolate place, since we’ve had next to no rain this summer and she has apparently packed up and left. Yet another climate refugee, I fear.

If you hear from her, please ask her to call and let her know that I put more minutes on her prepaid phone.

If only she had waited

Why am I still here at the Lab, you ask? The gigantic and very expensive roofing job had to be postponed for most of this week due to torrential downpours. A inch and a half of rain on Sunday and another inch yesterday. It’s enough to spook a roofer, so we start tomorrow, and by “we” I mean “they” start tomorrow. My involvement is to keep a fire extinguisher nearby and to see if my noise-cancelling headphones are good for anything beyond plane travel.

Whew! That was a lot. I’ve been having trouble with my web host, so this may not post correctly. Cross your things for good luck.

Your pal,

– bob

February 18, 2022February 18, 2022

The Smartest Man In The Room

Friends,

My Dad passed away the other day. He hasn’t enjoyed anything resembling good health for years so we weren’t taken by surprise. My family has assumed that every fall, every diagnosis, would be the “precipitating event” for longer than I can remember. It turns out there wasn’t one.

More Than One Math

Dad had a remarkable memory and ability to perform complex calculations in his head. You could tell that he was working on something by the slight head tilt and swivel up 10° and 7° to the right. Right eye in a squint, then he’d turn back to you and share the answer.

He did this to calculate the length of conduit to buy for a certain sized pool, a certain distance from its equipment. He did this to check a server’s math after receiving the check at a restaurant after memorizing the price of every plate ordered. He could tell you to a precision of a half hour how long it would take to fill that pool based on its volume and the flow rate from a garden hose.

I like to think that he enjoyed finding order in chaos. Lots of things are knowable, and understandable, if you think about them hard enough.

A Casual Relationship With The Manual

The skill I gained from him instead of his innate grasp of the mathematical world, was his desire to know how things work. No instructions? Not a problem, just take it apart and figure it out. Listen to experts. Pay attention to advice, then trust your instincts. And know when you’re in over your head.

This works great for mechanical things. Most things built by people can be taken apart. Systems can be understood.

However, Dad had very little time for instruction manuals or service guides. If he didn’t need a specific value, like a spark plug gap or what that flashing light means, he could usually figure it out on his own. He didn’t care for code readers and had no patience for the Internet. Too much chaff, not enough grain.

Precious Gifts

He wanted to make sure that I got to see The Ernie Kovacs Show when I was a kid and to understand why it was funny. It’s the only television I can think of that made him laugh out loud.

Above all, and I spent a lot of time on this in his obituary, he was kind and generous. Maybe a little too trusting of door-to-door salesmen, but it seemed like his default position was that everyone is inherently good until they prove otherwise.

A pretty good example to set, I think.

I miss him.

Your pal,

– bob

September 27, 2021September 27, 2021

Sometimes Life Is Like Owning A Pink AMX

Friends,

It’s been a very long time since I’ve posted up an update here and a lot has happened since the last post. Some very grim things and some lightly happy things that don’t seem to balance out the very grim things. I want to think that this is just a function of getting older, but we’re still (!!!) in a pandemic and there are studies that prove that politics is still to blame for a lot of deaths. Americans should be furious. I know I am.

When I was a tot, my best friend Jim and I were inseperable. We ran around and played and got into trouble and ate wheat paste and made each other laugh during catechism classes. We grew apart as we got older, but kept in touch infrequently. The last time I saw him was during his last month on this earth as he succumbed to the cancer that destroyed his burly frame, but never diminished his kindness and sweet demeanor. The party was for his parents’ wedding anniversary, but it really was for him. We hugged and he winced as I hugged his pain medication packs into his aching back. He was tired. He knew why we were there and seemed happy to see us.

I would like to take this moment to mention: Fuck cancer.

Jim’s sister is not a medical doctor, but she’s “done her research” on Facebook and convinced her parents that they shouldn’t be vaccinated against COVID-19. She told my Mom that she’s “very happy” that her parents hadn’t fallen for the constant barrage of media insisting they get the vaccine. They’re in their 80s, but worried about the vaccine’s long term effects. Jim’s father, one of the kindest men I’ve ever met, just died of COVID. I wonder if Jim’s sister is still so happy. At least we know he won’t have to deal with the long term effects of the vaccine.

I know a fellow who has a medical condition that prevented him from getting vaccinated. Too risky. He’s a sherrif’s deputy, one of our first responders who has risked his life saving others. He’s now a COVID long-hauler. Part of the reason we were supposed to get vaccinated early was to protect people like him. Folks whose immune systems put them most in harm’s way, like they weren’t already in harm’s way from the other stuff like bullets and blood and explosions.

If you’re like me (and may your omnipotent invisible friend help you if you are), you have a certain affinity for Roy Chapin Jr.’s AMC. It was scrappy, brash, and in big trouble. They were punching above their weight and taking shots at GM and Ford, who could do no wrong in the late 1960s. This was the era of the Matador coupe, Javelin, and the mighty AMX.

Now let’s pretend that it’s a half century later and you own a pink AMX. Maybe not that pink AMX, but it still garners the same attention and you still have to explain it. Why are you driving a pink AMX? Where did you get that pink AMX? Is it that pink AMX? And more recently, what’s an AMX?

Sometimes life is like that. Frustrating. Not simple. Not obvious.

File Under: Stormy Storms

Friends,

It’s been a little while since I’ve checked in here, so let’s catch up!

The Idyllwild Weather Clam

Our gal has been warning us for weeks from her tidepool that there were several arctic storms queing up over the Pacific Ocean and they’ve dumped their payload. It looks like we’re going to receive nearly two feet of snow by the time this is over later this evening.

That’s a better showing than last year.

Speaking of things that are better than last year…

We’re Not Dead!

Despite the slow rollout of the various COVID-19 vaccines, and the fact that we haven’t received our shots, we’re still alive! By “we” I also mean my entire extended family. This is remarkable and I’m tremendously grateful that everybody’s listening to the science instead of politically-motivated dopes.

Hey! Speaking of the intellectually unencumbered…

The Orange President Lost The Election!

In the middle of a global pandemic, he broke the Post Office, which made it tough on those of us relying on things to be shipped to our homes to avoid crowds in malls. Online retailers and pharmacies couldn’t get goods and medications to customers on time. He warned that absentee voting was a rife with fraud, despite the evidence against that lie. We held the safest and most corruption-free election in modern history, yet he claimed that the counting was rigged and his obvious victory was stolen.

When that didn’t work, he replaced the Secretary of Defense with a sycophant who ordered the District of Columbia National Guard to stand down, then he held a little rally. In his presidential remarks, he managed to whip up his supporters, sociopaths, and other dead-enders into a froth, encouraging them to storm the United States Capitol. While there, they managed to get five people killed and over 100 injured.

Despite all of this, his supporters, sycophants, supplicants and other Republican senators can’t seem to find anything wrong with the 45th president’s behavior. They can’t even seem to bring themselves to admit that Joseph R. Biden Jr. won the popular vote and the electoral collage votes to become the 46th President of the United States.

There’s a word for this. It begins with the letter T.

Speaking of insincerity…

Electric Cars For You and You and You

No really. General Motors has announced that they will stop manufacturing internal combustion engines in the next decade. They’ve said this before and walked it back, so there’s no reason to believe them this time except they may be looking for government R&D funding this time. They’ll probably get it, too.

Speaking of funding…

The Stimulus Debit Card

Is it me, or does the stimulus debit card feel like a weird Steve Mnuchin grift? Have you ever heard of that bank? Did you take the time to register on their site so you could transfer the funds to your bank? Shady.

My Birthday Holiday Season Has Begun!

I received the first birthday card for this upcoming momentous birthday today, thus kicking off this year’s Birthday Holiday Season. In case you don’t know the rules, it begins when you receive your first birthday gift and ends when the last candle is blown out. Some years, it has lasted for months.

No, I’m not complaining.

Yes, I am going to buy a replacement cell phone and invoke a discount that is available to people who reach this arbitrary number.

Yes, I will also try to get discounts based on an AARP membership, because I am a cheapskate.

Yes, I feel fine.

No, I don’t think I’ll keep going.

I hope you’re doing well. Take care of yourself.

More later.

Your best pal in the world,

– bob

January 11, 2021

File Under: Progress, Art

Friends,

If you mess around with the aperture and exposure settings in the camera, has the photo technically been manipulated? Probably!

It’s still cool looking and I thought I’d share.

Your pal,

– bob

January 4, 2021

Potato

Friends,

I’m not supposed to have potatoes. When I was first diagnosed with a faulty pancreas, my Dad was distraught. “I hoped you wouldn’t get this,” he said on the phone when I told him the news years ago. Understandable, since his father lost a leg and passed away far too young due to its complications.

My Dad offered this dietary advice back then: “don’t eat white things.” Like what? “Potatoes and rice are the big ones. Bread is the other one. Stay away from them and you should be in good shape.” Good thing he was talking about the common white things and not hominy and tripe because I was already avoiding those things like I avoid maskless crowds in the deli section at Albertson’s.

Unfortunately, I really enjoy the common white foods. Add thyme, shallots, cream, and gruyère and I’m all in. Hip deep. Even if it takes two hours to prepare.

My blood sugar is going to be a disaster.

I hope you’re doing well.

Your best pal,

– bob

January 2, 2021

No Zero Days

Friends,

I joined the hundreds of thousands of people across the globe who essentially took 2020 off. Not from work, at least not on purpose, but from the creative pursuits that we used to enjoy before the darkest year in living memory. Now that that The Orange Menace has been stopped at a single disastrous term in the White House, it’s time to get back to it.

Was I actually waiting for an election? Not really, but it does seem like a good place to plant a marker for a new start. Besides, being sad, out of shape, angry, cooped up in the house, and jobless (Twice! For the same pandemic!) has to end sometime. Why not now?

That’s why I’m taking the opportunity and nudge from C. Spike Trotman of Iron Circus Comics on Twitter to do something creative every day. Writing is the thing I’m doing today. Yesterday it was reinventing my old vegetarian chili recipe to make it gluten-free after almost a decade hiatus. I made it every New Year’s Day for fifteen years or so based on Carrol Shelby’s Chili Mix but without the meat. Now it’s got a big helping of Impossible Burger browned and mixed in. Pretty good!

Tomorrow, I start working on a special project that I’ve been hoping get off the ground for years. This year is the year. It’ll be stupid. I hope you like it.

More later.

Your best pal,

– bob

May 6, 2020May 6, 2020

What Are You Doing? Worldwide Quarantine Edition

Friends,

Like everyone else on the planet, we’ve been holed up in the house for the last month (Could be a few weeks, or two months. Hard to tell.) and I find that the years spent sequestered in my Secret Alpine Laboratory served me well. What started out as temper tantrum to withdraw from big cities/life/commitment turned into a meditation. “What do you do when you’re by yourself for a couple years?” First, particularly when it’s snowing outside, you get depressed. “What happens when you’re alone and it’s snowing and you have no real income?” That’s much worse

What that means now, that it’s pretty important not to go out and mingle, but to have the benefit of a job that can easily be done remotely and the benefit of a sweet and loving partner, is that staying in is easy. The state’s Stay At Home order isn’t going to last long enough to forestall another huge wave of infection because politicians will cave to the loud minority agitating to get a haircut and line up at Golden Corral. That’s bad news for people like me who, by my latest count, are vulnerable times three. Too old, too asthmatic, and too diabetic.

Here’s the fun part: Will my employer be indemnified from providing unemployment insurance to people who are vulnerable to infection who demur from a return to work order? What choice will that leave me, a person terrified of being broke and sequestered once again?

I’d just begun a program of going out and mingling now that I’ve identified some folks at work who I’d like to mingle with. I’m certainly not going out to mingle any time soon.

As I write this, more than 75,000 Americans have died from complications from a SARS-CoV-2 infection. Some people online have wondered why, as a country, we’re not mourning. Why no big obituary pages? Why no profiles on teevee with sad violins in the background? I think the answer is simple: The slow-motion tragedy isn’t over yet. The car is still crashing. The towers are taking months to collapse.

The Federal Government is doing not much at all to help. Political donors were made whole, but the response was late and not enough. Scientists who dare speak out are removed. Doctors who complain are dismissed. A vaccine is months away and I’m not going to play this game of Hot Lava Where Everything Is Lava Everywhere until there’s a safe vaccine that works, and I’m able to get one.

So, anyway, it’s been a while. How are you doing?

Your pal,

– bob

January 19, 2020

What Are You Doing? Playoff Weekend Edition

Friends,

It’s a lovely January weekend here in Northern San Diego County. Even though the anticipated rain storm never really materialized, we still did inside stuff, like making ravioli. We’re going to wait a bit to try the ravioli (and tortellini made from the same ingredients), but the filling is going to top a pizza in about twenty minutes, so we’ll see how it tastes after the pie is baked.

Speaking of food, we both suffered from brunch at the in-laws’ in-house dining facility. Imagine getting punched in the gut for a few hours and you’ve got something of an idea. Note to self: Next time, skip the omelette bar. No, really.

That wasn’t really the point, though. Being the family tech support, I got to fix music streaming problems (get rid of the web browser and stream from iTunes to Airplay receiver instead), and palm rejection on the laptop (it doesn’t work, hit fn+F3 to turn off the trackpad on the Dell laptop thing).

We also spent some time watching football. So. Boring.

That’s mostly it. Maybe we’ll have a chat about the Hiroshima Carp baseball club and why you should care.

Of course you should care.

Your pal,

– bob