A Jaunty Little Blog – Page 3 – No-wax, easy maintenance, bacteriostatic, and anti-slip.

April 5, 2022June 8, 2022

Get A Long, Little Doggie

Friends,

I’ve been struggling lately. This pandemic has been wearing heavily on everybody, so much so that some individuals have decided on their very own that it’s over. Of course, the pandemic isn’t over, but a more liberated fiction is appealing. It’s dumb and dangerous, but appealing.

I thought that it’d be nice to travel this summer and get away for a little while from the sadness of losing parents and pets over a short few months. My sweet bride’s suggestion to go see Giant Sequoias and Redwoods was very appealing and easier to envision without having to mind a fleet of furry ding-a-lings.

But Phoebe happened.

We’re her fourth home (perhaps, maybe more) and she’s had a bunch of puppies. She’s now enjoying a new comfortable home, a couple squares a day, and all the attention she can stand. In return, she’s ready to offer her belly in case you’d missed the opportunity to give her a rub only minutes before. Free of charge, she will chase away neighborhood cats with a serious, but understated growl.

Now let’s see how she travels.

Your pal,

– bob

UPDATE: Here’s the right song to listen to while you enjoy this post.

February 18, 2022February 18, 2022

The Smartest Man In The Room

Friends,

My Dad passed away the other day. He hasn’t enjoyed anything resembling good health for years so we weren’t taken by surprise. My family has assumed that every fall, every diagnosis, would be the “precipitating event” for longer than I can remember. It turns out there wasn’t one.

More Than One Math

Dad had a remarkable memory and ability to perform complex calculations in his head. You could tell that he was working on something by the slight head tilt and swivel up 10° and 7° to the right. Right eye in a squint, then he’d turn back to you and share the answer.

He did this to calculate the length of conduit to buy for a certain sized pool, a certain distance from its equipment. He did this to check a server’s math after receiving the check at a restaurant after memorizing the price of every plate ordered. He could tell you to a precision of a half hour how long it would take to fill that pool based on its volume and the flow rate from a garden hose.

I like to think that he enjoyed finding order in chaos. Lots of things are knowable, and understandable, if you think about them hard enough.

A Casual Relationship With The Manual

The skill I gained from him instead of his innate grasp of the mathematical world, was his desire to know how things work. No instructions? Not a problem, just take it apart and figure it out. Listen to experts. Pay attention to advice, then trust your instincts. And know when you’re in over your head.

This works great for mechanical things. Most things built by people can be taken apart. Systems can be understood.

However, Dad had very little time for instruction manuals or service guides. If he didn’t need a specific value, like a spark plug gap or what that flashing light means, he could usually figure it out on his own. He didn’t care for code readers and had no patience for the Internet. Too much chaff, not enough grain.

Precious Gifts

He wanted to make sure that I got to see The Ernie Kovacs Show when I was a kid and to understand why it was funny. It’s the only television I can think of that made him laugh out loud.

Above all, and I spent a lot of time on this in his obituary, he was kind and generous. Maybe a little too trusting of door-to-door salesmen, but it seemed like his default position was that everyone is inherently good until they prove otherwise.

A pretty good example to set, I think.

I miss him.

Your pal,

– bob

January 13, 2022January 13, 2022

What Will You Be Doing?

Friends,

If you go back to the very beginning of this rumbling, bumbling, stumbling mess of a memoir, you’ll see that I veered away from a joke of the day format to longer posts not long after 9-11-2001. Not long after that, a bunch of us were relieved from our employment at The 23rd Largest Marketing Communications Agency (by billings) in the country. I spilled a lot of pixels howling about that loss two decades ago.

This is a pretty good soundtrack for this post. Enjoy!

Since that time, I’ve been trying to find a new copywriting gig. I sent out hundreds of applications, fashioned a marketing department at an old job, and I even started my own short-lived business. To say that these efforts failed to hit my career out of the park would ignore that I’ve been swinging at a lot of wild pitches for a very long time. It’s been exhausting.

Well, dear reader, the drought has ended. I’ve been hired by U.K. firm Twogether as their first U.S.-based copywriter and I couldn’t be more excited about it. I’ll be working from my remote office here in northern San Diego County putting words in a specific order that will compel people to do things! For money!

I know what you’re thinking. “Hey Bob, I’m happy for you and I wish you all the best in your new job, but does this mean that you’re going to stop posting to A Jaunty Little Blog altogether?” Heavens no, imaginary reader! In fact, I’m getting ready to start new features that will waste even more of your time. I understand that you’re busy and I haven’t been giving you the high-quality words and phrases on a reliable schedule that you had come to expect. However, I can now make this promise to you: if we’re not completely debilitated in our rampaging pandemic, imprisoned following the next civil war, or we don’t have to become refugees from our nascent religious fundamentalist minority white rule ethno-kakistocracy, I’ll have hours of entertaining content here for you!

Tell a friend!

Your pal,

– bob

October 17, 2021

It’s The Spanish Word For Minivan Ownership

Friends,

I applied for a job to write for the ad agency that operates the auto buying service for a big box retailer you’ve heard of. Had a couple interviews that went well and waited to hear word on their decision for what seemed like far too long. Eventually, they passed.

While I was waiting, I heard from a recruiter who thought I’d be great for an opening at a flooring company minding their database of dimensions and color profiles. I did that for Hewlett Packard half a lifetime ago and it led to some big things. As long as I’m starting my career over, might as well start over from the beginning.

Okay, this will make you mad: I went through a couple interviews and poured my guts out, then waited for far too long, again. When they finally made their decision, they decided to go with nobody and hire an agency to do the work. It’d be less expensive, they said.

So yes, I’m back at it. If you know anybody who needs a copywriter, let me know!

Your pal,

– bob

September 27, 2021September 27, 2021

Sometimes Life Is Like Owning A Pink AMX

Friends,

It’s been a very long time since I’ve posted up an update here and a lot has happened since the last post. Some very grim things and some lightly happy things that don’t seem to balance out the very grim things. I want to think that this is just a function of getting older, but we’re still (!!!) in a pandemic and there are studies that prove that politics is still to blame for a lot of deaths. Americans should be furious. I know I am.

When I was a tot, my best friend Jim and I were inseperable. We ran around and played and got into trouble and ate wheat paste and made each other laugh during catechism classes. We grew apart as we got older, but kept in touch infrequently. The last time I saw him was during his last month on this earth as he succumbed to the cancer that destroyed his burly frame, but never diminished his kindness and sweet demeanor. The party was for his parents’ wedding anniversary, but it really was for him. We hugged and he winced as I hugged his pain medication packs into his aching back. He was tired. He knew why we were there and seemed happy to see us.

I would like to take this moment to mention: Fuck cancer.

Jim’s sister is not a medical doctor, but she’s “done her research” on Facebook and convinced her parents that they shouldn’t be vaccinated against COVID-19. She told my Mom that she’s “very happy” that her parents hadn’t fallen for the constant barrage of media insisting they get the vaccine. They’re in their 80s, but worried about the vaccine’s long term effects. Jim’s father, one of the kindest men I’ve ever met, just died of COVID. I wonder if Jim’s sister is still so happy. At least we know he won’t have to deal with the long term effects of the vaccine.

I know a fellow who has a medical condition that prevented him from getting vaccinated. Too risky. He’s a sherrif’s deputy, one of our first responders who has risked his life saving others. He’s now a COVID long-hauler. Part of the reason we were supposed to get vaccinated early was to protect people like him. Folks whose immune systems put them most in harm’s way, like they weren’t already in harm’s way from the other stuff like bullets and blood and explosions.

If you’re like me (and may your omnipotent invisible friend help you if you are), you have a certain affinity for Roy Chapin Jr.’s AMC. It was scrappy, brash, and in big trouble. They were punching above their weight and taking shots at GM and Ford, who could do no wrong in the late 1960s. This was the era of the Matador coupe, Javelin, and the mighty AMX.

Now let’s pretend that it’s a half century later and you own a pink AMX. Maybe not that pink AMX, but it still garners the same attention and you still have to explain it. Why are you driving a pink AMX? Where did you get that pink AMX? Is it that pink AMX? And more recently, what’s an AMX?

Sometimes life is like that. Frustrating. Not simple. Not obvious.

The Boss Says, Swapping Aerosolized Body Fluids Promotes Productivity!

Friends,

Since we last grabbed each other in this little do-si-do, I have obtained employment, enjoyed some weird boosterism, put a family member in the hospital, stared into the maw of despair, and have come across a remarkable discovery. That’s right, it’s a housekeeping post.

Let’s box this gnat!

I’ve been applying for copywriting jobs for over a year with no success. I’m a tough sell on paper: out of the agency business for decades, and in-house samples from non-profit don’t obviously transfer to sales jobs. The other problem is I don’t know the jargon. This shuts a lot of doors for recruiters and HR people who are ticking boxes. As you’ve learned after any time browsing posts here, I hate jargon. I’ve spent an awful lot of time removing jargon. I’m good at it. I’ve always felt that if you hide behind industry buzzwords, you either don’t know what you’re talking about or you’re gatekeeping. I’ll keep applying until I find a kindred spirit, but in the meanwhile, it’s tech support.

Tech support is cleaning up other people’s messes. Usually, those messes are created by software engineers on a deadline who ship product before it’s complete, completely vetted, tested, and reworked. I understand why they do it, but that makes you, dearest reader, an unofficial software tester. You get to figure out why Outlook can’t handle that many deleted items and Excel can’t open your friend’s spreadsheet because it’s Tuesday. I get to fix it.

My current gig isn’t awful. The half-hour commute takes me to a biotech shop on the coast. Good start! The place is staffed with a lot of adults, which is a refreshing change. They just want to do a good job and go home. No real politics that I can discern. The downside is that it’s a temporary position on a contract. They may hire me, which is an idea it seems like they’re thinking about, but as far as I know now, it’s a no-benefits/onsite position all summer.

Speaking of onsite, the bosses have decided that all employees will return to the office this Tuesday after working from home since March of last year. There’s a lot of grumbling and management haven’t handled it well. Like businesses across the country, they started with the first rationale: that in-person work leads to greater collaboration and productivity. This is an assertion that really hasn’t been proven. There are no workplace studies. Nothing to back it up except hearsay and absurd commercial property values. This was quickly followed up by, “Because I say so.” Playing this card is so very popular with the rank and file workers who know that zero work has been done on ventilation systems, vaccination validation, and that very little effort has been put into revising sanitation protocols. Folks love it.

The boosterism comes from the bosses and human resources folks sending out bulk emails about how are super excited to see everyone! All you precious little knowledge workers with the tops of your adorable noggins poking over the tops of low cubicle walls fill our hearts with glee.

The knowledge workers I’ve spoken with aren’t feeling it. They’ve built home offices, rearranged schedules, taken on childcare and eldercare commitments, and now they’re being asked to chuck it in the bin. Folks feel like they’re doing the work and building premium products without needing to warm a company-issued chair.

The nature of work has changed. People aren’t just working for a paycheck anymore. Okay, I am actually working for a paycheck at the moment, and there are millions out there like me. My goal, and suspect the goal of the rest is a simple one: Work to live, don’t live to work. Enjoy what you do. Make a difference. Make it count.

Keep a kind thought for my father-in-law who was admitted to the hospital a week ago with pneumonia. He’s as weak as a very puny and out of shape kitten, so he’s going to need a lot of rehab to get back to full strength.

Also, Stinko brought some daughters to the desert and I fed them enchiladas at my parents’ house. He was subdued, but seemed to enjoy the visit and the attention. Please do what you can to cheer him up by spending outrageous amounts of money at his shop, won’t you?

We’re keeping gluten-free at my house for reasons (Celiac Disease can be pretty rough. I don’t have it, but I’m an ally in the struggle. Also, did you know that Celiac Disease is considered a disability when you’re applying for jobs? Let’s have a chat about why that’s case sometime later. Not now.) and we’ve been able to find gluten-free puff pastry dough. We made spanikopita with the stuff and it’s amazing. Light, flaky, and very tasty. If you find it in the freezer section, stock up. You never know when it’ll be back.

Thanks for passing through. Now it’s time to separate and go home.

Your best pal,

– bob

UPDATE: The original version of this post was a grammatical mess. I fixed a bunch of stuff, but if you see some glaring error, please let me know. Thanks!

May 12, 2021May 12, 2021

Sometimes The Universe Just Knows

Friends,

I’ve been looking for a new gig for a while now and it’s really getting to be a drag. I’m spending a fairly large number of hours every day applying for jobs on various sites, responding to recruiter queries, chatting on the phone with talent acquisition professionals, and involuntarily twitching when an email from Phil at Ziprecruiter arrives with jobs that “he” thinks I’ll like. I just want to get hired for a job that I can enjoy and be fairly compensated for that work. That opportunity feels strangely elusive until today.

I had a nice chat with a talent acquisition professional who was lovely on the phone, did not seem to mind the spotty cell coverage at my Secret Alpine Laboratory. She suggested that I would move to the next interview round after consultation with another manager, so I’ll take that to mean that it went well.

Then, I spied in my inbox that a job I’d been passed over for a month ago is open again. It’s a weird one for sure; a high-paying custom picture framing job. Mostly production-type work, but they’re working on building their custom framing business. I can do that! I’ll even join the Professional Picture Framers of America to lend legitimacy to the effort. That sounds like good fun.

I hit Apply, then got a notification that the local company that’s been selling home automation gizmos for decades has an opening. You know how I love my gadgets, integrating X-10 Powerline stuff into Dad’s high-end swimming pool projects to provide rudimentary remote control. I automated the Lodge before that was a thing. Now I’ve moved to Homekit, but I think I better brush up on my Zigbees and my Z-Waves.

Yes, of course I applied. This could be very entertaining.

That’s a lot of fingers to cross, but I hope you’ll spare some phalanges for your best pal in the whole world.

– bob

May 2, 2021May 2, 2021

Hibernation Ended

Friends,

It’s been a little while since I last checked in, so consider this A STATUS UPDATE!

First, here’s the song you should be listening to while reading. You’re welcome.

Now! To the business at hand. I’m now two weeks out from the second Moderna jab and we’re getting out into the world again. I don’t really remember how to act around people, so I’m going with the default for all of the amazing delivery drivers who have sacrificed their safety to keep me isolated during the last year: slobbering gratitude. If my side effects from the second Moderna shot were only a fraction as bad as getting Covid-19, I would’ve been terrified to be out in the world. This pandemic is not a joke and I’m concerned that we’re not nearly prepared for the next one, or the one after that. As my late grandmother admonished, maybe we should just stay in bed and pull up the covers.

While it’s great advice, it doesn’t pay the bills.

I have a few live job opportunities in the pipeline at the moment. Of course I can’t tell you about them because I do not wish to invoke the jinx. What I can say is that there are a couple tech support gigs and a couple copywriting gigs. Each one has things to recommend it. Employee discounts, big pay, and neat perks. It’ll be fun to see which one makes an offer first.

My sweet wife has started to believe that my piney paradise is a nice place to spend time, so she has encouraged me to fix up the place a bit. I find it hard to disagree with this.

We went furniture shopping today to pick up a couple larger pieces that should add a more adult feel to the cabin. Bookshelves and end tables and even a dresser made the list. This, however, did not make the cut…

Woof. The headboard lights up.

Your best pal,

– bob

March 22, 2021March 22, 2021

Opportunities

Friends,

As you know, I’m still looking for a full time gig after the contract information technology “engagements” fell flat. I had a nice interview this afternoon with the copy manager at a software house in New York, so that looks promising. In the meanwhile, I thought it would be nice to get some work published elsewhere that I can add to the portfolio.

I threw my hat into the ring at a nascent auto industry analysis site and they asked for a writing sample. The brief was in “500 or fewer words about something you don’t see getting any coverage, but you think the auto enthusiast press should be reporting on.” Oh boy, I can write that all day. So I did!

Media Should Talk About The U.S. Auto Industry

I’m old enough to remember Chrysler’s bankruptcy in 1979. The evening news led with breathless coverage about the ensuing loss of jobs, the political ramifications, the victims and who to blame. Foreign manufacturers were demonized. It was a very important American crisis.
I’m also old enough to remember the triumphant stories heralding Lee Iacocca’s repayment of emergency government loans ahead of schedule to save Chrysler. This made him a very important American business leader.
Renault’s takeover of AMC? I remember the gasps of horror. How can the French own American Motors? Then somebody said, “Jeep” and everybody nodded. Chrysler’s takeover of AMC? “There’s Lee, flexing his muscles,” the media shrugged and moved on.
It wasn’t until the Daimler take over of Chrysler and the media’s stenographic coverage of the “Merger of Equals” that the auto industry merited some sort of analysis again. Not the right sort, of course. Not the kind that would have identified the OE’s exposure to collapse at the hands of the credit markets.
Now, post-Carpocalypse, post-UAW bashing, post-bailout coverage is mostly a Tesla blooper reel.
I think I’m old enough to handle the truth about each car maker’s plans for American mobility. Are they planning on continuing to make cars at all? What’s driving their decision making?
Nobody has said a peep about why the Stellantis merger happened in the first place except that the late Sergio Marchionne though any merger would be a good idea. It can’t just be to sell Challengers in Brazil, can it?
I’d like to find out about these things. Wouldn’t you?

I hope that little rant lands me a sweet, low-paying gig. Maybe it’ll even lead to something else that’s could be a lot of fun.

Fingers crossed.

Your pal,

– bob

March 2, 2021March 3, 2021

Cloaking Device

Friends,

As you may know, my contract at my “forever job” wasn’t renewed and the bosses wouldn’t tell me why. My superpower, to make a simple thing into a catastrophic thing when I lack information, has led me down many soul-crushing paths. Maybe they didn’t renew my contract because of that one day when I wore Converse All-Stars into the office instead of fancier basketball shoes favored by my colleagues. Or maybe it was simply lack of funding.

Hint: It’s always funding.

Then my cool software administrator job started. Knowing that we had a 4-year contract with the client, I figured that I could work with that. It would be plenty of time to show them our talent and hopefully extend that contract. What could go wrong!

Funding? Again? That’s what they said when they cancelled the contract two months in, so that’s what we’re telling everyone else.

Now it’s time to look for new jobs and talk to recruiters, including the friendly guy from Texas who’s recruiting for a tech job at a local hospital. Big round trip to find people in a five-mile radius, but I gladly took his call. “I’ll send you more details in a moment. What’s your preferred email address?” he asked. Then nothing.

Hours later, still nothing. He probably got the address wrong and the email bounced. No worries, I’ll just call him back.

“Oh, hi. This is Bob Therieau. Is this [redacted]?” *click*

Of course I called back and the call went straight to voicemail.

It’s important to note at this point that I’m not all that qualified for his job. I did that work years ago (it seems like I’ve done a lot of jobs at some point), but I’m not currently doing that work. I could figure it out, just like I figure out the computers and software that I’ve been asked to support before I’ve ever seen them, during my entire career, but that’s everybody’s objection, isn’t it?

“The client is looking for a copywriter who has recent experience writing cat food radio commercial scripts.” “I wrote dog food commercials a few years ago.” “Oh dear, I don’t know. That’s not really the same, is it? Two different markets…”

There are a few more things in the pipeline, but I don’t think I’ve ever had a recruiter actually hang up on me. This is a wild time to be looking for a new job, but that was really weird. He could have just said something if I don’t meet the criteria.

You know. Just say something.

Your pal,

– bob

WEIRD UPDATE: Did Texas recruiter call back today? Yes, he did! Something, phone’s messed up, didn’t see the voicemail, etc. You legitimately have earned extra points if you saw that coming. But, you know. You could’ve said something.

February 3, 2021

The Second Third

Friends,

My Birthday Holiday Season has begun! Clap hands!

Actually, it started over the weekend when my kind in-laws, who are living in a nearby Dutch-reformed-themed retirement community (complete with working windmill!) brought a lavish gift of photography gear. This was followed by a check from my folks who are holed up in their home in the desert.

Is there cake? Yes, there’s cake. Phone calls poured in from well-wishers, which is always welcome.

Will there be more? Yes! Big plans for the weekend (Or so I’ve heard. Very exciting.)

What we’ve learned is that having a birthday on a Tuesday kinda blows. It’s too far away from the leading weekend and too far from the following weekend. Annoying. That said, I am going to make it my business to see that other people who are having birthdays in the middle of the week during a pandemic will still get the maximum fun treatment. This is because your birthday is your own personal holiday and deserves a suitable celebration.

Sometimes I think that I’m the only person who believes this. There are times when I hear, “Ugh, I’m getting so old,” when I share my Dad’s retort: “It sure beats the alternative.”

Your pal,

– bob

P.S. Bonus sunset photo!

January 29, 2021

File Under: Stormy Storms

Friends,

It’s been a little while since I’ve checked in here, so let’s catch up!

The Idyllwild Weather Clam

Our gal has been warning us for weeks from her tidepool that there were several arctic storms queing up over the Pacific Ocean and they’ve dumped their payload. It looks like we’re going to receive nearly two feet of snow by the time this is over later this evening.

That’s a better showing than last year.

Speaking of things that are better than last year…

We’re Not Dead!

Despite the slow rollout of the various COVID-19 vaccines, and the fact that we haven’t received our shots, we’re still alive! By “we” I also mean my entire extended family. This is remarkable and I’m tremendously grateful that everybody’s listening to the science instead of politically-motivated dopes.

Hey! Speaking of the intellectually unencumbered…

The Orange President Lost The Election!

In the middle of a global pandemic, he broke the Post Office, which made it tough on those of us relying on things to be shipped to our homes to avoid crowds in malls. Online retailers and pharmacies couldn’t get goods and medications to customers on time. He warned that absentee voting was a rife with fraud, despite the evidence against that lie. We held the safest and most corruption-free election in modern history, yet he claimed that the counting was rigged and his obvious victory was stolen.

When that didn’t work, he replaced the Secretary of Defense with a sycophant who ordered the District of Columbia National Guard to stand down, then he held a little rally. In his presidential remarks, he managed to whip up his supporters, sociopaths, and other dead-enders into a froth, encouraging them to storm the United States Capitol. While there, they managed to get five people killed and over 100 injured.

Despite all of this, his supporters, sycophants, supplicants and other Republican senators can’t seem to find anything wrong with the 45th president’s behavior. They can’t even seem to bring themselves to admit that Joseph R. Biden Jr. won the popular vote and the electoral collage votes to become the 46th President of the United States.

There’s a word for this. It begins with the letter T.

Speaking of insincerity…

Electric Cars For You and You and You

No really. General Motors has announced that they will stop manufacturing internal combustion engines in the next decade. They’ve said this before and walked it back, so there’s no reason to believe them this time except they may be looking for government R&D funding this time. They’ll probably get it, too.

Speaking of funding…

The Stimulus Debit Card

Is it me, or does the stimulus debit card feel like a weird Steve Mnuchin grift? Have you ever heard of that bank? Did you take the time to register on their site so you could transfer the funds to your bank? Shady.

My Birthday Holiday Season Has Begun!

I received the first birthday card for this upcoming momentous birthday today, thus kicking off this year’s Birthday Holiday Season. In case you don’t know the rules, it begins when you receive your first birthday gift and ends when the last candle is blown out. Some years, it has lasted for months.

No, I’m not complaining.

Yes, I am going to buy a replacement cell phone and invoke a discount that is available to people who reach this arbitrary number.

Yes, I will also try to get discounts based on an AARP membership, because I am a cheapskate.

Yes, I feel fine.

No, I don’t think I’ll keep going.

I hope you’re doing well. Take care of yourself.

More later.

Your best pal in the world,

– bob

January 11, 2021

File Under: Progress, Art

Friends,

If you mess around with the aperture and exposure settings in the camera, has the photo technically been manipulated? Probably!

It’s still cool looking and I thought I’d share.

Your pal,

– bob

January 11, 2021

Insurrection.

Friends,

I’ve had a little time to think about the insurrection attempt promoted by the sitting president of the United States that ended in a bloody skirmish in this nation’s capitol. Giving this a little bit of space has been helpful, even though the act and the implications rising from these acts have left me as shaken as I was after the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake (we see what you did there. shaken. cute. -ed That wasn’t my intention, even though it’s all about “intention” nowadays. I’ll get to that later.)

Considering that nobody is really in charge in the Executive branch of government right now, and that the folks who should be protecting the inauguration of Joe Biden are under the Executive in the org chart, I think it’s safe to worry about the future of the American Experiment. I think we can also be clearheaded about the problem that a lot of Republicans are okay with a constant state of seige, including an uncomfortably large number of elected representatives. I can only assume that these are largely intelligent people who are cynically going along with the mob for political gain.

What I don’t know, is what to do with this dread I’m feeling right now.

Your pal,

– bob

January 4, 2021

Potato

Friends,

I’m not supposed to have potatoes. When I was first diagnosed with a faulty pancreas, my Dad was distraught. “I hoped you wouldn’t get this,” he said on the phone when I told him the news years ago. Understandable, since his father lost a leg and passed away far too young due to its complications.

My Dad offered this dietary advice back then: “don’t eat white things.” Like what? “Potatoes and rice are the big ones. Bread is the other one. Stay away from them and you should be in good shape.” Good thing he was talking about the common white things and not hominy and tripe because I was already avoiding those things like I avoid maskless crowds in the deli section at Albertson’s.

Unfortunately, I really enjoy the common white foods. Add thyme, shallots, cream, and gruyère and I’m all in. Hip deep. Even if it takes two hours to prepare.

My blood sugar is going to be a disaster.

I hope you’re doing well.

Your best pal,

– bob