Friends!
This gloable whirming thing is really getting me down. I’ve done everything—burning raw coal (from the open pit I’ve started digging in the backyard), dragging out all the old aerosol cans from the garage and taped down the nozzles, fed the dogs beans and kielbasa (a phenomenally bad idea, btw)—everything I could think of to pump more carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. No luck. It’s still chilly up here.
What does a fella have to do?
Three inches of snow predicted tomorrow night. Spring, yeah sure.
Your pal,
bob