Friends,
A Riverside County jury, after deliberating far longer than I would’ve required, has convicted Raymond Lee Oyler of murder and arson. Future resident of hell, Oyler, was found guilty of starting the Esperanza Fire, killing five firefighters and burning down homes. The penalty phase of the trial is anticipated to take up to four weeks to complete, but once again, I can speed up the process!
Let’s look at the facts: he’s been proven to be fond of fire, he looks down a lot, and we can really do without this guy hanging around. That’s right, I’m recommending exacting brutal vengeance! Either I’m recommending it, or the cold medicine is. You be the judge!
Your best pal in the whole (now brighter) world,
– bob